No Cries for Help Here! I'm the Hero!
by thisgirlfornow
Summary: Alfred has a terrible secret that has been tearing him apart for years. How will his lover react when it is revealed? USUK. Trigger warnings: Binging, purging, and body issues.


No Cries for Help Here! I'm the Hero!

**TRIGGER WARNING: Binging, purging, and body issues are present in this fic. I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable or upset, so please take this warning into consideration before reading.**

Alfred wasn't sure when it began really, but it had to have started somewhere around the 20th century. He just couldn't stop himself from eating whatever was in sight; he couldn't control himself around piles of fat-ridden burgers and fries or resist temptation around sugary, carbonated sodas.

He absolutely hated himself for it. Though, no one knew; he was a master of putting on a face for his audience, be it his many bosses or fellow nations. If they had known, maybe they would have though twice about calling him names like "fat ass," or commenting on the vast amount of food that he would consume. He could never stand their judging eyes or their pointed laughter.

Somewhere around there, the purging began. He remembered the first time, when his shaky fingers entered his mouth in a sad attempt to find the right spot, the place that would make everything go away. He couldn't control that now either. How utterly pathetic.

Every time he would do it, he could hear the ridicule, cycling around his mind like a broken record. He never meant to be like this, but what could he really do about it? He was fat, hideous, idiotic, a combination of everything wrong in the world and then more. He was at fault and he couldn't take it anymore.

After flushing away his shame, he rinsed with some mouthwash and looked in the mirror, noting his pallid complexion and red, watery eyes.

"Let's get this over with." He hoarsely said to his reflection. Alfred turned away and began to ready himself for the day's meeting, screwing on his trademark smile with some difficulty before he left his apartment.

xx

Arthur had noticed that something was off about Alfred recently, but he couldn't put his finger on it. The American was acting normally enough with his cheery smiles and obnoxious laughter, but it didn't seem to be reaching his eyes. They looked so dull and weary, like the boy was burdened by the weight of the world...

He sighed and shrugged it off for the moment. Alfred was a superpower after all; that never came without some amount of stress. He would make sure to confront him about it today though before he was completely worn out by the pressure. It was his job after all, as both his former caretaker and his lover.

As he sat down in his assigned seat, he could not help but to observe the young nation. He looked awfully pale today, his normally tan skin had lost its luster and his hair lacked its usual luster. That boy really needed to pay more attention to his well-being!

Of course, Alfred noticed the attention and shot a smile in Arthur's direction with a small wave before heading over.

"Hey there, Artie! Haven't seen you in forever, dude! What's up?" He asked with his normal amount of energy before sitting down in the seat next to Arthur.

England scoffed, "How many times do I have to tell you, you twat, my name is Arthur. Though, if you can't get that through your damned skull, you could always call me England." He gave a small smile to America nonetheless as he knew by then that he never would call him by his proper names, "I have been doing well though, thank you for asking. How have you been, love? Well, I hope."

"I've been amazing as usual! Nothing can get this hero down!" He proclaimed, pointing to his chest with pride.

"I see." Arthur said, "Very good." The meeting was then called to session before he could say anything to America, Germany's voice demanding that everyone get to their seats post haste.

"Well, see ya 'round, Artie. Maybe we can catch up after the meeting or something." He winked before walking toward his seat and the meeting on the state of the global economy began.

xx

The meeting took its usual course with a seemingly endless amount of presentations and the usual amount of heated banter amongst the usual suspects. In the normal fashion, nothing had been accomplished by the time Germany called the meeting to a close for the day with his drawn out sigh. Various nations gathered up their paperwork and presentation items and began to make their way to their respective lodgings for the night.

Alfred was throwing his materials into his briefcase haphazardly when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around, facing England with a small smile on his face.

"That went pretty well, huh?" America asked, garnering a small chuckle from his companion.

"Well is most definitely not the word I would use." Arthur smiled and clapped Alfred on the back once more. "How about we go out tonight? We can go to our usual place, order a couple of pints, and reminisce or something."

"Sounds great!" Alfred replied. The two made their way out of the building and hailed a cab; ten minutes and a minimal fee later, they were at their usual bar, the White Lion, where the two procured some food as well as the promised drinks.

America smiled, finding comfort in the routine; yet, underneath his veneer, he felt his usual food-related anxiety as their meal arrived. Once again, he had ordered too much, restarting his vicious cycle. He rubbed his thumb nervously between his index finger in attempt to calm himself down and look normal in front of his former caretaker.

"Is everything okay, Alfred?" His concerned companion asked, "You seem rather nervous tonight."

A chord of panic was struck causing Alfred's blue eyes to widen slightly. He quickly regained his composure and laughed England's comment off.

"I'm fine, old man." He said, earning a glare from the other nation. "There's nothing I can't handle. I'm the hero, remember?" He grinned another plastic smile before scarfing another burger down.

England sighed. "Well, if you're sure..." He trailed off, "If you do need to talk about something, you know that you can come to me right?" He looked toward his munching companion in hopes that he would take his comments seriously for once.

"Artie, don't worry so much." Alfred said in through long sips of his fizzy drink. "I can handle anything the world throws at me! I'm a superpower, dude!"

"Alright then." Arthur said though he was still quite unsure, "Forget I said anything then." He took a large sip of his rum in an attempt to shake his concern.

"Already done." Alfred stated before launching into a multitude of different topics. Arthur continued to observe him as he still was not convinced that Alfred was really alright.

xx

Neither of the two were all that drunk by the time they left the bar, only sporting a moderate buzz from the alcohol. They hailed another cab before heading off to America's place as the nation said he had this brand new album that England just _had_ to listen to before the night was over. That is how Arthur found himself happily making out with the American on his black leather sofa with the previously mentioned music playing in the background and an uncorked bottle of wine on the coffee table.

Though the two acted rather distant around the other nations, their "Special Relationship" had been developing quite steadily over the years into a comfortable, stable companionship. It had been rather difficult at times, with the distance between the two and the suffocating amount of work that went into being a nation, but the two somehow made it work year after year.

The two broke off in order to take in some much needed oxygen. Their eyes and bodies maintained contact as the music flowed sensually around them. Arthur smiled at his lover before leaning over to close up the wine. He grabbed Alfred's hand and motioned to the bedroom.

"Let's go, love." He spoke, "We have an early day tomorrow." Alfred followed and the two soon collapsed into a heap on the bed. Alfred put his arm around Arthur, pulling him close and kissing his forehead before bidding him goodnight. The two fell asleep in absolute comfort with sleepy smiles.

xx

Arthur awoke suddenly in the middle of the night, patting the bed in a search for his cuddly, space heater. He sleepily looked up at the alarm clock to find that it read 2:00 AM in its red, block lettering. He yawned and rubbed his eyes before rolling out of bed in search for his lover.

"Alfred?" He quietly asked, "Where are you, pet?" He took a couple of lazy steps into the hallway. He paused as he heard a noise coming form down the hall. Was that retching? He slightly quickened his pace toward the small bathroom and found that the door was cracked.

He gasped as he saw Alfred leaning over the toilet with his fingers down his throat before throwing up the contents of his stomach once more. His eyes began to water up as he saw bits of food, bile, and blood.

"Alfred!" He cried before rushing into the room. "What on Earth are you doing!? Stop that right now!" He quickly wrapped his arms around Alfred and flushed away the terrible sight.

At this point, Alfred began to openly sob against Arthur's shoulder, holding onto him with his shaking limbs. "I need help!" He said in near hysterics, "I don't know how this happened. Please, England! Please!"

England stroked America's back soothingly; he was still in shock over the entire ordeal. How long had this been going on? How had he not noticed? Questions were swimming around in his head as he tried to make sense of what he had just witnessed.

"Shh, shh." England whispered while willing his voice not to crack, "It's all going to be alright, love. I'm here and we are going to fix this okay? You're going to be fine; I promise."

Alfred cried out once again choking out apologies that England tried to quiet down. He wiped off Alfred's face with a cool rag and gave him a glass of water to drink before taking his hand and walking him back to bed. He sat back and let Alfred clutch him while stroking his golden hair.

"Don't be afraid, love. I'm right here." England said softly, "Go to bed now." He placed a kiss on Alfred's brow and watched as he quickly fell into a deep sleep.

Arthur remained awake and planned for the next day. Screw national duties and meetings, Alfred's well-being was far more important. He was willing to do anything for his love; he always had been.

He was going to make everything okay, one day at a time.

End.

**A/N: I would like to apologize to anyone who may be offended by this subject matter as that is ****not this piece's intent. As a person who has been struggling for many years with eating disorders, I recognize that they are no laughing matter and should be taken very seriously. To help settle my conscience, I am going to leave this here. This is a confidential help line for the National Eating Disorders Association: 1 800 931 2237.**

**Reviews and constructive criticism are appreciated. Flames will be ignored. Thank you for reading.**


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